FOOD FOR THOUGHT - A DEVOTIONAL
Jacob said, "For what a relief it is to see your friendly smile.
It is like seeing the smile of God!"
~~ Genesis 33:10 ~~
A smile is nourishment for the heart, and laughter is medicine for the soul. But sometimes, amid the stresses of the day, we forget to take our medicine. Instead of viewing our world with a mixture of optimism and humor, we allow worries and distractions to rob us of the joy that God intends for our lives.
Today, as you go about your daily activities, approach life with a smile on your lips and hope in your heart. Look for reasons to laugh and to smile. The world needs every smile it can get, including yours.
the more you will find it. ~~ Barbara Johnson
A Prayer: Dear Lord, You have given me so many reasons to celebrate life. Today, let me be a joyful Christian -- quick to smile and quick to laugh. And, let Your love shine in me and through me, this day and forever. Amen.
A Woman of Prayer, 365 Daily Devotions, Freeman-Smith LLC, Publishers
SOME NONSENSE
You simply cannot imagine how routine my week has been. For me, routine means that no one was excruciatingly sick (Rob and I both have colds - that's not excruciating) and I'm especially thankful that my grandbabies aren't sick, although I'd love someone to remind me why they ALWAYS have runny noses this time of year, even when they're not sick. Good grief. I wish I owned stock in Kleenex. (I'm lying - I should own stock in the roll of cheap TP I keep on my kitchen counter.)
I have nothing earth shattering to share with you, although I'd like you to hang in and read to the end of this post.
Check this out. My pasta pot! Honestly, I've had it forever and it just never occurred to me that it's kind of a unique pot.
I know what you're thinking. She's really digging. But seriously, this is just the best pot ever.
I should have started this months ago, but I couldn't because about six months ago, my left wrist went completely nuts and it still hurts so much, all the time, that things like crocheting or hand sewing are really difficult. Santa stars don't require a lot of hand sewing, but when you're making 108 of them (36 sets), just the position you have to have your hand in, the repetitive motion, for each step, becomes difficult.
But...I'm by gosh making Santa stars. And that's a small miracle, because...
SOMETHING YOU NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D HEAR ME SAY....
I know that the people who've faithfully followed me for almost four years have been wondering, what on earth is wrong with Barb. I haven't been posting. I haven't been doing craft or cooking tutorials. I haven't been visiting my blogging friends and commenting on their posts.
So here's what's going on. It took me a long, long time, ten months, to figure this out but it finally hit me.
All I want to do is sleep.
I couldn't really care less about food. Therefore, I've been doing the kind of cooking that gets you by but isn't inspirational. I haven't tried a new recipe in forever. Cooking tutorials are pretty hard to come up with when the best you can come up with is grilled cheese and frozen fries.
I've lost interest in blogging because I just don't seem to be able to come up with anything I think anyone would want to read.
I've lost touch with people who I really care about, especially my blogging friends, and I've been so snarlish, I've hurt some feelings too.
All I want to do is sleep.
Last Wednesday, I went to bed at 5:30 in the afternoon. And I slept for fourteen hours. And I woke up feeling tired.
So there you have it.
If this isn't classic depression, I don't know what is.
I have no idea why this has happened. But I do know this. Depression is not to be messed with. It's real and I'm telling you, it not only hurts, it's scary. It affects every last single aspect of who you are and it turns you into someone you don't know.
So I'm working my way through this. I feel like I'm climbing a moutain that just never ends, but I'm working on it.
I truly have no desire to do anything, but I so, so want to make Santa stars. So I make myself get up and work on them, every single day.
I'm forcing myself to go through the motions because I want the holidays to be special for my little family. I want to make it as special as I've always made it, and I think if I just keep putting one foot in front of the other, sooner or later I will conquer this.
I'll tell you something. Depression isn't for sissies. So if you know someone who is depressed, please, please extend them some extra kindness, because it's awful.
I hope you never find out how awful it is.
Please don't give up on me. I WILL be back. I'm trying, really really hard.
xoxoxo






